Friday, January 19, 2007

Back from the messy realm of Real Life

Right. So I've been a bit MiA lately. (Not that anyone's reading. That would require me getting up the courage to post comments on other people's blogs enough for them to recognize me and, after awhile, wonder about me as a person enough to look at my blog.)

I have made a little progress on my NaNo rewrite. Not nearly as much as I'd like. I'm going to have to pick up the pace quite a bit if I want to keep my (admittedly self-imposed and therefore unfortunately flimsy) deadline of March 31st. It's going so much better with Vivessa than with Averi, though. It's more my lack of dedication that's doing me in. Or, wait, that's unfair. (No, really. It is.) I've been keeping to my rule of writing something every day, but that something has been a bit pathetic lately. We're talking double digits. That's because with all the other crud I have going on, I rarely get to writing until I really should have the lights out.

Seriously, though. The sheer number of days that I come home feeling like I've been steamrolled is completely out of proportion to my age. (That's how those things are supposed to work, right?) Ah, least one of my commitments will be over tomorrow, most likely. I have the statewide semifinals of an academic competition tomorrow. Last year we were stomped on. I'd like to win at least two rounds this year.

Alright, now back to the main point of this entry. Or at least why I came back to my blog in the first place. I was reading over at Agent in the Middle, and the three articles she did on marketing yourself and your book terrified me. I'm not a social person. I've been told I'm the family extrovert, but that doesn't mean much. I suppose I'm outgoing in some ways, but one of my biggest fears is making myself look like a total idiot (or worse, an amateur) and I have no idea how to go about looking professional. I can't even bring myself to comment on people's blogs, for crying out loud. Even when I feel I have something legitimate to add to a discussion, I'm always held back by my thinking, "Why would someone even read this when there are so many people talking that they know better, people who have books and agents and clients and reputations?"

I am trying, though. One of the things she mentions is to start a blog and write about what you write. I have no idea if I'm reading that correctly, but I'm trying. She also says that book sales just don't do well if you're not a part of a community. And besides the marketing aspects, I like being part of communities. It's just that my general antisocialism (is that even a word, past the political meaning?) holds me back.

On the internet.

I don't remember feeling this pathetic, though I'm sure it's happened.

Well, I'm off to wrestle with a banquet scene that's just about to shoot me if I don't write it. My father thinks I let my characters push me around too much. Sigh.

No comments: